easy street... kind of

Yesterday I returned from the most highly anticipated, incredibly amazing reunion of my life.

When I finally saw STM's smiling face as he walked towards me from the terminal, I knew that things hadn't changed. And they just got better from there.

This past weekend was filled with many firsts. First time to meet the parents. To meet the bro. To meet the whole damned extended family, actually. To have dim sum in Houston. To see my boyfriend become a doctor.

Every day I am more deeply enamored. With him, there is a connection that I have never felt before. If it didn't feel so natural, the fact that he can read my thoughts after 7 months of long distance would be downright creepy.

Life together is unimaginably easy. We just need to get through next year's hurdles before we can truly enjoy it.

the final push

I've become the girlfriend I never wanted to be, and I hate myself for it. I go through irrational mood swings, I need constant affirmation and I say things I don't mean in order to bait him into saying what I want to hear.

I'm pushing. I know I'm pushing, and yet the more I see it, the more of a problem it becomes.