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Today's plusses
- teaching 4th grade Junior Achievement
- having productive meetings
- temps in the 70's
- going home 6 minutes early
- looking at amusing pix of team building day at Habitat For Humanity
Today's minuses
- learning about 4th grader's desire to start own dog fighting ring
- breaking a nail
- discovering missing windshield molding caused by windshield replacement negligence
Today's saving graces
- receiving email from JA teacher assuring me of intention to talk to troubled student
- apology from Mr. Glass & guarantee of free replacement molding
- working out, albeit for 25 minutes
- watching cheesy romance movie on FOX
- contemplating upcoming fantastic weekend with boyfriend
Looks like the orchids did something for my test scores today... Amazingly, I did as well as - OK, actually better than - I had hoped! More importantly, thank sweet [deity of choice] I don't have to put myself through it again!!
Of course, I am somewhat disappointed in the fact that I felt stumped by all but the easiest math problems, but I made up for it, miraculously, in the verbal section. Why I was never an English major, I will never know.
Since leaving the Prometric Testing Center, I have been laying in bed, surfing the web & watching Hide and Seek. Despite my best efforts to believe that I am finally done studying, I am still lying here, feeling as though I should still be cracking open the books.
Maybe a glass of wine will change that...
Having totally kicked ass on today's full-length practice computer adaptive test, I promptly came home this afternoon, ordered digital prints to be picked up at Target tomorrow, reheated a gourmet meal for dinner, drank two - TWO! - glasses of wine, and sat my ass on the couch to enjoy Sunday night television. I remember the days when the only thing to look forward to on Sunday nights was the X-Files. Before reality TV - the good old days. I am happy to see that non-reality is still holding its own.
Does anyone else out there watch Gray's Anatomy? Is Sandra Oh not the most hilarious character ever?
At some point this week I swear I am going to shout "SOMEONE SEDATE ME!" I'm not saying when, I'm just saying it's gonna happen.
While not as productive today as I had hoped, I still managed to get a significant amount of studying done. My good intentions to get to the local coffee shop at 8 am were thwarted when I woke up in a panic at 8:27 am and thought, "My God! The alarm isn't set for weekends!" Fortunately, and according to my therapist, I am now better equipped to deal with an unexpected change in plans - I studied in the quiet of my dining room while I waited until 10, when the local library opened.
It seems that I am the only person in Fort Worth who regularly takes advantage of our huge-ass temple of literary bliss and intellectual solitude... And I like it that way. When I think back to my days as a young and impressionable bookworm, I remember feeling overwhelmed and nervous at the thought of being among so many unread books. Behold, the magnitude of the task before me! This continued even throughout my high school years, which seemed to involve a lot of studying at the Sharon Public Libary or various institutes of higher learning. Even Tisch and the BPL struck some semblance of fear into the very core of my being, as, for me, each new library presented a new set of questions - Will their internet work? How is their fiction catalogued? Do they have private study areas? Will they have what I'm looking for? Will I be be able to accomplish enough during my time here? Will the decrepit library monitor confiscate the tall Starbucks nonfat hazelnut latte protruding from the inside of my peacoat like a fanny-pack gone terribly wrong? Only time would tell.
These days, I'm not so anxious about libraries. Perhaps it's because my visits are mostly recreational. But even now, when I seek a quiet room in which to study, my experience is fairly pleasant. I can finish the work I set out to finish with minimal discomfort. I also think that I can attribute a large part of my ease in the FWPL to the fact that, in contrast to past experiences, there is so little library traffic to contend with. I know, almost without a doubt, that My Study Room will be always be available. Toddlers don't study, and, around here, adults don't appear to, either.
In fact, the day I encounter an adult making use of MY coveted spot is the day I will either heartily congratulate them for pursuing higher education or accuse them of pedophelia. Regardless, the conversation will end with me kicking the offender out. Because you're allowed to do that when it's your study room.
A little sanity goes a long way.
Not to say that my state of mind is / has been stress-free as of late. I still have a GMAT to stress about for the next 9 days. In fact, my body appears to be rebelling against the ebb and flow of recent anxiety levels and has decided to break out with a mild case of hives. At least according to my highly-scientific self-diagnosis. Tomorrow's doctor's appointment may prove otherwise.
Regardless, I feel that I have regained a sense of balance. Just about a month ago I felt out of control, wondering what emotional calamities tomorrow would bring. I was so nervous that I couldn't eat. Today, however, I ate a sesame bagel with whipped cream cheese, a Hershey's dark chocolate nugget with almonds, leftover dijon-herb salmon with rice and green beans, a banana, chocolate cake, a white chocolate cranberry cookie, more salmon (this is what happens when your freezer is full of summer's bounty), broccoli, and milk. And I'm sitting here wondering how to satisfy my sweet tooth.
My reformed eating habits aside, I find the bloggerific quality of my life declining, now that it is decidedly less dramatic. I could tell you about how great/happy/promising/etc. my recently rekindled relationship has been, but a.) I try not to air laundry, dirty or otherwise, in a public forum, and b.) it's just not interesting blog fodder. I could discuss my GMAT woes at length. Or brag about being a newly-certified SCUBA diver. But that would only entertain for so long.
Maybe this "almost normal" thing will rub off and I will learn to release some more of my inner drama queen. Until then, my sincere apologies for boring you all to hell and back.
